Well at least I now know what is behind that locked door in my flat...

There's a locked door in my flat, I don't have the key.

This is what happened, last night in bullet points

1. Woken up a 1:45am by 2 large bangs 1 after the other
2. Think it was outside, Manchester, roll over go back to sleep
3. A very loud bang definitely in the flat
4. Think "being broken into", sh1t self
5. Push bed in front of bedroom door and ring 999
6. I wish I had a tape of this bit, another bang and light from around the door, emergency services operator hears it.
   me: (whispering in case murderers in flat hear me) "fu*/@k, did you hear that?"
   him: "yes, sending someone right now"
7. 5 mins of sitting in the dark hiding behind bed
8. Police turn up, go into flat, no masked killers, terrorists, nothing broken, feel stupid
9. Policeman listening at the locked door hears strange fizzing noises
10. They ring "Trumpton" "they gonna be pissed off at you mate" he says smiling (they really called the fire brigade Trumpton)
11. Now 2:30 am
12. Fire engine turns up all lights etc
13. 7 firemen and man in a white helmet that they all called "pump" all trying to get in the flat at once
14. Policemen loving it
15. Firemen decide the best thing would be to bust the locked door open
16. They bust the door open.
    Its now 2:45 am and I think I may have dreamt the bangs
17. Luckily, behind the locked door is the old house mains supply that should have been disconnected when they converted to flats and has got wet from the rain and is arcing a lot...It wasn’t just me then
18. The fire men call the electric men
19. 3 policemen, 7 firemen and "pump" and 2 electric engineers, not large flat, very funny
20. It explodes again and finally shorts itself, but is still connected to the mains so the electric people dig a hole in the garden and cut it off.
21. Police and firemen leave
22. After digging the hole and finding the live electric cable the first thing the "engineer" does is get his biggest hammer and hits it very hard?
23. I go inside and find a book to read thinking line from Brazil: "They've gone back to metric without telling us, again!"
24. 6 am they cut off the power, flat does not go dark, leave big hole in garden
25. Landlord has lots of messages on answer machine "the flat has exploded", "firemen are knocking down the door" etc
26. Quick sleep
27. Cycle to work

That is all